Morocco: What Every Woman Needs to Know

(MENAFN- Morocco World News) realand verybigproblem. I am talking about street harassment.

Street Harassment Streetharassmentis defined as a form of sexual harassment forced on a stranger in a public space without their consent. It includes catcalling whistling sexually explicit comments sexist remarks homophobic or transphobicslurs groping leering stalking flashing sexualassault and rape. Street harassment limits people's mobility and access to public spaces. It is a form of gender violence and it is a human rights violation.

Street harassment issuch a serious issue in Morocco and it hinders the quality of life for women in this country both local and foreign. It is my least favorite part of the culture hereand I can tell you firsthand in just a half-yearI've had countlessincidents certainly more than I care to admit. Let me preface this by stating that I am not a shy or coy person. I have strong opinions and a strong personality.I've traveled alone (prior to having my son) all over the world visiting four continents andover 20countries. I can hold my own and I'm not afraid to advocate for myself or anyone else. I am non-Muslim but I dress conservatively out of respect for the culture and choosing to live in a Muslim nation. This means jeans and dresses to my ankles and long sleeve shirts. No skirts no spaghetti straps no cleavage and nothing too tight. Even soMorocco wears on me in a way no other countryever has and it is without question the hardest place I have ever lived. I have never experienced this level of harassment or disrespect anywhere else in the world.Itis constant and nearly daily and after months of it well you just start feeling worn down degraded and frankly fucking. over. it. I do not get used to it and I certainly do not become numb to it and I'd like nothing more than for something serious to be done to eradicate it.In a nation that is 99% Muslim thatprides itself on strict reverence to family high respect and regard for women and modesty in behavior and dress Morocco is far from faultless and has a long way to go on this issue.

I would go so far as to say sexual harassment is endemic to Morocco.Not only is it widespread and rampant it is largely culturally accepted as something that has always existed and will always exist. It is a cancer hereand there is a very common mentality that itwill notchange because well men are men. And here's the clincher: NO woman is immune fromit. It does not matter your age size ethnicity or religion. Muslim non-Muslim foreigner expat mini skirt or hijab married unmarried with children without children black white brown young old every woman is likely to experience harassment of some kind at some point even womenwho are pregnant! So what kind of harassment are we talking about here? Itcomes in many forms including: catcalling hissing leering staring stalking following groping whistling winking making unwanted sexual advances verbally or non-verbally lewd language domineering body language and reacting aggressively when denied or challenged sometimes to the point of physical violence.

Personal Incidents I have experienced more than my fair share of street harassment most of which has occurred in broad daylight as I walked with my toddler son in his stroller. Allow me toillustrate:

My ass was grabbed by an old man in Djemaa El Fna.

Myboob was aggressively grabbed by aminor boy about 10 years old as I walked to the Sunday vegetable market in Tangier.

I've been followed by men in carsand taxis multiple times in multiple cities. They typically drive in a slow stalkerish manner either just behind or besideme often motioning for me to get into their vehicle or asking me to 'come here'. Some have parked while I've gone into a shop and awaited myexit.

I've been followed into shops a few times.

I've had young boys make lewdcomments as they pass me on motos and bicycles.

I've been leered at hissed at stared at winked at more times than I can even count.

I've had men approach me saying things like 'nice fat ass' and 'nice boobs' and 'I like your body' and 'thank your mother for me.'

Aman followed me on the street as I walked for 15 minutes then proceeded to flag down my taxi get in the seat behind me and started asking questions. I got out of the cab five minutes later to shake him off. I did not want him knowing where I lived!

AJeep full of men were gawking and commenting as I walked to the post office one afternoon. I had my fill of it flipped them off and yelled 'go fuck yourselves.' The driver immediately u-turned the Jeep and drove up beside me screaming at me. I yelledback but it wasaggressive and scary and perhaps could've turned into a nasty altercation.

I've been followed home into my apartment complex late at night by a complete stranger.

I've been directly propositioned for sex.

A man approachedmy familyin the medina in Marrakech. I felt he was a creepster so I didn't engage with him but my family membermistook his creepiness for friendliness and talked to him for a while. He followed us around and was quite insistent on helping us. I told him again and again we didn't need his help. At 11 pm that night he showed up at our riad asking for us. Luckily management didn't let him in. I was aghast! My family member had told him where we were staying! Never ever do that! We ran into this guy a couple more times and he was always on us. The only way I could get him to leave us alone was to get in his face threaten to report him to the police and take his picture.That seemed to do the trick.

I was solicited by a male sex worker while shopping in the medina in Asilah. He approached me from out of nowhere spoke only in Spanish and said 'You are beautiful. I want to sleep with you. Come to my house. I do massage.' He showed me half-nude photos of himself on his phone was very insistent followed me for over 30 minutes and was very hard to shake off.

My aggressors have ranged in age from about 10-years-old tomen old enough to be my grandfather.If there is any benefit at all in notunderstanding Darija (Moroccan Arabic) it is that I am unable to understand the litany of things that have been hurled at me verbally.

Why Is Sexual Harassment So Rampant? You may be wondering if it's necessary to even discuss this and while itlikely stems fromnumerous factors I do think it's important to dissect the causes so we can treatthe symptoms and in time cure the disease. It is cultural? Is it because premarital sex is illegal in Morocco punishable by imprisonment? Are men sexually frustrated as a result? Is itmen's way of flirting? Is it the sexually stifled reaction of a fairly conservative and modest culture? Is it because men traditionally dominated the public sphere and believe it is theirs to do as they please? It it due to widespread gender segregation resulting in lack of social interaction between the sexes? Do men simply not know how to socialize in appropriate ways with women? Is it because misogyny runs deep? Is it due to genderinequality? Is it because there is a lack of education surrounding women's rights? Is it because there are no fully enforced sexual harassment laws in Morocco to protect women against it? Is it because Morocco is a fairly male-dominated society and men behave this way to assertthatdomination? It is purely to intimidate women? I'm afraid I cannot pinpoint a direct cause and it's most likely acombination of all these things.

There is no separation of religion and state in Morocco. In most Muslim-majority nations various aspects ofSharia(Islamic Law) are incorporated.Islamic law does in fact form the political structure of Moroccan law including Moudawana or Moroccan Family Law. Moroccohasone of the most progressive family law codes except for Tunisia but forMoroccan feminists it still has a way to go. Misogyny exists worldwide but it seems to run a little deeper in the MENA (Middle East North Africa) andwe cannot pussyfoot around the topic of religion if we are to address this subject entirely. In theSurahAn-Noor(The Light Noble Qur'an) Allah states: 'Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty. That will make for greater purity for them. And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. (24:30).

In Islam both men and women are encouraged to be modest in dress and behavior and respectful of one another.There isn't an addendum that states: 'If a woman isn't dressed modestly you are permitted to harass herbecause she clearly welcomes it.' I'm being facetious here but I've actually heard Moroccan men say 'women who dress immodestly want to be harassed.'Sexual harassment in Morocco is a cultural issue not a religious one but it's mighty hard to separate the two as religion heavily influences Moroccan culture. Muslim men take great pride in being Muslim and very few will admit to being non-practicing but as long as they do not abide by the entirety of the Qur'an aren'tthey being religiously hypocritical? How many Moroccan men have harassed a woman at one point in their lives? If nearly every woman who has set foot on Moroccan soil experiences it just how many men are really out there doing it?

Dealing With Invalidation I've talked at length with women about sexual harassment (both Moroccan and foreign women living here many of whom are married to Moroccan men as well as some men both foreign and local) and with the women ironically itcan turn into a very heated and contentious debate. There are always some who react defensively andinvalidate the reality of it.Obviously racism sexism and misogyny exist worldwide but to diminish what is happening in Morocco truly does a disservice to women here. It's never okay to trivialize invalidate or diminish someone's experience yet it happens again and again hereby women! It's also delusional because 9out of 10 women in Morocco experience sexual harassment and that is a fact.

I've come across a small but very vocal sect of womenin Morocco who believefeminist idealsarenothing more than a modern form of western colonialism. That we white 'first-worlders' are imposing our enthnocentric values onto them and that western feminism has no place here. It becomes the all too common battleof Islam vs. the West. The'us' who are free vs. 'them' who are oppressed. To me that is not it at all andI think reducing it to those terms really missesthe marrow. We are all women in the world and the fact iswomen in the world suffer inequalities in nearly every country on the planet based on socio-economics gender lack of equal access to education and opportunities and diminished representation in positions of power whether governmental political or financial. Whether a woman self-identifies as a feminist or not I believe most women would agree that life in Morocco would be better for them if harassment didn't exist and if there were laws to protect them against it. Most women would prefer to move freely in the public space without such rampant disrespect. That being said I must also point out that there are somewomen who seem to enjoy theharassment and respond positively to it. By far they are the minority but they do exist.

I think it's important to understand thatthe MENA is not withoutits own prominent feminist movement withmany Muslim women advocating for a gender revolution throughout the region. This includes the incredibly bright courageous and prolific Arab feminists (see Fatimma Mernissi (RIP) Mona Elthaway and Huda Sha'arawi) as well as theindigenous Amazighwho are steadfast in their fight topreserve their matriarchal traditions. These are fascinating women who have either pioneered the movement or are still very active today in Morocco and beyond. I encourage you to look into their work and movements because MENA and Arabfeminism is an entire subject of its own.

Some women have internalized sexism in Morocco which to me is more disturbing than the street harassment. I've personally been called a racist and a colonizer by other women for A) criticizing men's behavior and B) suggesting that 'just ignoring it' ultimately doesn't change it for the greater good of all women. As a foreign woman it was made pretty clear to me by a select fewthat I have no place trying to change things in Morocco. I was told it is impossible and it is not my place. But sexual harassmentin Morocco is a women's issue and I am a woman living in Morocco. It affects me personally. It affects my experience it affects my family and ultimately it affects every woman I know here. Ilive in the world just as you do and I can and will speak out against issues concerning my gender no matter where I happen to reside. To change the culture of street harassment requires a movement brought by us women (local and foreign) by the men who stand against it and by Morocco's political and religious leaders. It starts first with respecting validating and supporting one another!

How To Respond In A WayThat Works For You When I first arrived andwas shocked by the glut of harassment I was experiencing I turned to women living here and asked them what todo.Nine times out of ten I wastold to just ignore it. This is obviously the path of least resistance. You givethe harasser zero response and go about your business.This may work for many women (the locals are the largest advocates for this)but personallyI'm not a big fan of the path of least resistance especially when it comes to sexism and misogyny. When men behave badly toward me I tend to respond. I never want Moroccan men to think I welcome enjoy or tolerate this behavior. I also believe firmly that ignoring it may work individuallyin the moment but it does nothing permanently for the larger collective. It doesn't challenge the status quo; it doesn't reject the harassment; and it certainly doesn't change the culture. Those are my $0.02 on the issue butevery woman must decide for herself what response (if any) works best for her. Here are some options.

Ignore it.Put on your best RBF (resting bitch face) walk with purpose and confidence and ignore any and all unwantedmale attention. This is the easiest option without question and often the most effective indiffusing the behavior. It's pretty hard to engage with someone who isn't engaging back. The men harassing you do not even exist. Move on dot com.

Dress conservatively.If you want less attention show less skin. Women in fullniqab still get harassed so I'm not sure this is fullythe solution but there is no harm in dressing modestly and I do believe itworks in your favor. Certainly women who dress in more revealing clothing get more attention. If you are part of the'I'll Wear What The Hell I Want Club' I'm afraid this is not your option and you are indeed going to attract more attention.

Hollaback. Hollaback toyouraggressors to let them know you do not accept enjoy or tolerate their harassment. Shout at them in your native languagelearn a few phrases in Darija (see below) scream angrily or find a tacticthat works for you. Connect with others for support and advice. There is a grassroots movement working to combat street harassment globally based on the concept that our bodies are not public space just because they exist in the public space. Check outHollaback.orgfor more information. I hollaback! Do you?

Shame them.'Hshuma'is the Moroccan concept of shame. It carries greatweight in Moroccan culture because shame is considered repugnant. Moroccans do look externally for validation so how Moroccans behave in public is of paramount importance. The expression is used in variouscontexts and situations toward behaviors that are deemedsocially wrong and culturally unacceptable.Generally speaking anybehavior that falls outside the social norm is referred to ashshumaincluding speaking ill of others swearing disrespecting elders anythingharam(forbidden) in Islam etc.The concept ofhshumais best explained as the conscious feeling of guiltiness resulting from doing something perceived as wrong. When in doubt usehshuma!It works!

Threaten to go to the police.While the police are largely ineffective and won't likely help you at all with street harassers Moroccans still fear them. Threaten to reportyour aggressorto the police and take aphotograph of their face or license plate number with your smart phone or camera. This will typically send them packing. I've used this method numerous times. So far 100% efficacy! Please beware that some men respond quite negatively when you defy deny or challenge them. Only threaten them ifyou are in a public place during the day and there are other people around you. Do not attempt this alone at night where your aggressor may turn violent toward you.Moroccans are generally not violent people and I never fear anyone here but you do need to be careful. Situations can escalate and turn ugly real quick. I know women who haveexperienced physical violence and I myself have been in situations that have scared me a little. Put your safety first.

Learnsome phrases. If you want your aggressor to know that you aren't down for harassment arm yourself with some phrases in Darija. I highly recommend this if you are going to be in Morocco for an extended period of time want to maintain some semblance of your dignity and want to shame/shock them using their native language. Here are some phrases to start you off:

Hshumaalikor7achouma 3lik:Shame on you. *If you remember nothing else remember this one! Shame is big in Morocco and this phrase can stop an aggressorin his tracks.

Sir f halek: Go away!

Sir t9awed:F*** off! [most offensive]

B3d menni:Get away from me!

3tini tissa3:Give me space!

Mat9aisnich:Don't touch me!

Mat3awdS t-tb3ni:Don't follow me anymore!

Radi nbllR l-bulis:I'm going to call the police!

Don't be a bystander. Sorry to generalize here but Moroccans are notorious bystanders. I have yet to see anyone intervene in situations involving aggressivefights violence against women in public car accidents etc. Don't be a bystander! If you see a woman being harassed intervene and help her!

Get creative.Women in Mexico are combatting street harassment by pointing confetti guns at their aggressors. Women in the US are handing outflyers to their aggressors. Check out these amazing responses from EverydaySexism.